My impersonation of Google


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  1. <title>Goofle Web Search</title>
  2. body{font:16px verdana;background-color:#fff;color:#000}
  3. #out{width:60%}
  4.  
  5. String.prototype.replaceAll=function(a,b){return this.split(a).join(b)}
  6. function ge(s){return document.getElementById(s)}
  7.  
  8. function addglink(glink){
  9. var s="<p>";
  10. s+="<br><a href='http://";
  11. s+=glink.address;
  12. s+="'>";
  13. s+=glink.title;
  14. s+="</a><br>";
  15. s+=glink.text;
  16. s+="<br><font color=#008000>";
  17. s+=glink.address;
  18. s+="</font>";
  19. return s;
  20. }
  21.  
  22. function go(){
  23. setTimeout("gload()",500);
  24. ge("main").style.display="none";
  25. }
  26.  
  27. function gload(){
  28. var q=ge("in").value;
  29. var o="";
  30. if(q){
  31. var r=q.replaceAll(" ","-");
  32. var s="<b>"+q+"</b>";
  33. var glink=new Object();
  34.  
  35. glink.title="Find "+s+" on eBay!";
  36. glink.text="eBay has "+s+" and tons of other great gift ideas! Find it on eBay!";
  37. glink.address="www.ebay.com/"+r;
  38.  
  39. o+=addglink(glink);
  40.  
  41. o+="<hr>"
  42.  
  43. glink.title="All the "+s+" you could ever ask for!";
  44. glink.text="This site has been discontinued. Thanks to all the loyal members who made it such a success.";
  45. glink.address="www."+r+".com";
  46.  
  47. o+=addglink(glink);
  48.  
  49. glink.title="Does anyone know where I can find "+s+"?";
  50. glink.text="1 post<br>0 replies";
  51. glink.address="www.random-forum.com/bb.php?threadid=49672357";
  52.  
  53. o+=addglink(glink);
  54.  
  55. glink.title="No "+s+" allowed!";
  56. glink.text="No "+s+" allowed on this site. By using this site, you agree to the terms and conditions stated herein. Any use of this site by persons...";
  57. glink.address="www.srs.biz/terms.html";
  58.  
  59. o+=addglink(glink);
  60.  
  61. glink.title="Porn shopping viagra "+s+" gambling";
  62. glink.text="penis enlargement, "+s+", granny porn, concert tickets, pokemon, orange juice, gay sex, christmas tunes, nipple slip, mp3, anal...";
  63. glink.address="www.antsnrvg.com/hepzhszr.html";
  64.  
  65. o+=addglink(glink);
  66.  
  67. glink.title="The site for all who hate "+s;
  68. glink.text="I really hate "+s+". People who search for "+s+" are weirdos. They should all be brutally murdered.";
  69. glink.address="www.anti-"+r+".com";
  70.  
  71. o+=addglink(glink);
  72.  
  73. glink.title="All the best "+s+" links";
  74. glink.text="Page last modified on 5/29/1997"
  75. glink.address="www.oldarchives.com/"+r+".html";
  76.  
  77. o+=addglink(glink);
  78.  
  79. glink.title="Youtube - This aint no "+s;
  80. glink.text="See music videos by The Flaming Nutsacks";
  81. glink.address="www.youtube.com/video?watch=275355662";
  82.  
  83. o+=addglink(glink);
  84.  
  85. glink.title="I was talkin to my girlfriend about "+s;
  86. glink.text="...so then I tole her about the "+s+" an she said that was ok but then i had to go take her to the back of the building and the whole time i was...";
  87. glink.address="boringdork.blogger.com";
  88.  
  89. o+=addglink(glink);
  90.  
  91. glink.title="Some bastard stole my "+s;
  92. glink.text="...as I stepped on the bus, the jerk grabbed my "+s+" and ran away. I was already late, so I couldn't go chasing after him.";
  93. glink.address="busyguy.blogspot.com";
  94.  
  95. o+=addglink(glink);
  96. }
  97. ge("out").innerHTML=o;
  98. ge("main").style.display="block";
  99. scrollBy(0,-10000);
  100. }
  101.  
  102. </script></head><body onload="ge('in').focus()"><center>
  103. <div id=main>
  104. <h1>Goofle</h1>
  105. <input id=in onkeypress="if(event.keyCode==13)go()">
  106. <button onclick=go()>Search</button>
  107. <div id=out></div>
  108. </div>
  109. </body></html>

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