<?xml version="1.0"?>
<layout version="0.1.0">
	<default>
		<reference name="root">
			<reference name="top.links">
				<!-- Add custom links. Pretty self-explanatory.
				Dig into app/code/core/Mage/Page/Block/Template/Links.php for more info -->
				<action method="addLink" translate="label title">
					<label>About Us</label>
					<url>about</url>  <!-- can use full url also -->
					<title>About Us</title>
					<prepare>true</prepare> <!-- set true if adding base url param -->
					<urlParams helper="core/url/getHomeUrl"/> <!-- base url - thanks @Russ! -->
					<!-- there are a few param you can send to do different things in <urlParams>
							 dig into app/code/core/Mage/Core/Model/Url.php, around line 803 -->
 
					<!-- below adds #add-fragment to the end of your url -->
					<!-- <urlParams><_fragment>add-fragment</_fragment></urlParams> -->
 
					<!-- below adds ?add-query to the end of your url -->
					<!-- <urlParams><_query>add-fragment</_query></urlParams> -->
 
					<!-- below gives you a new session id (i think...)-->
					<!-- <urlParams><_nosid>true</_nosid></urlParams> -->
 
					<!-- below replaces double quotes, single quotes, greater than, and less than signs
							 to their respective url escaped replacements (%22, %27, %3E, %3C) -->
					<!-- <urlParams><_escape>i'm-a-blog-url</_escape></urlParams> -->
 
					<position>1</position>
					<liParams/>
					<aParams>class="top-link-about-us"</aParams>
					<beforeText></beforeText>
					<afterText></afterText>
				</action>
 
				<!-- Removes 'My Account' link - Default position: 10 -->
				<action method="removeLinkByUrl"><url helper="customer/getAccountUrl"/></action>
 
				<!-- Removes 'Wishlist' link - Default position: 20 -->
				<!-- for Magento 1.3.x -->
				<action method="removeLinkByUrl"><url helper="wishlist/"/></action>
 
				<!-- for Magento 1.4.x -->
				<remove name="wishlist_link"/>
 
				<!-- Removes 'My Cart' AND 'Checkout' links
				Default position: 40 and 50 respectively -->
				<remove name="checkout_cart_link"/>
 
				<!-- To re-add 'My Cart' or 'Checkout' after removing both -->
				<block type="checkout/links" name="checkout_cart_link_custom">
					<action method="addCartLink"></action>
					<action method="addCheckoutLink"></action>
				</block>
			</reference>
		</reference>
	</default>
 
	<customer_logged_out>
		<!-- Removes 'Log In' link - Default position: 60 -->
		<reference name="top.links">
			<action method="removeLinkByUrl"><url helper="customer/getLoginUrl"/></action>
		</reference>
	</customer_logged_out>
 
	<customer_logged_in>
		<!-- Removes 'Log Out' link - Default position: 60 -->
		<reference name="top.links">
			<action method="removeLinkByUrl"><url helper="customer/getLogoutUrl"/></action>
		</reference>
	</customer_logged_in>
 
</layout>

http://classyllama.com/development/magento-development/editing-magentos-top-links-the-better-way/

magento add links in local xml

magento

XML